It's been a bit quiet over here on the adoption blog, but things have been less than quiet on our journey. As much as I wish this was an update to let you know about an exciting development, it isn't quite that. It's been quite a roller coaster over the last few months and I wanted to take a minute to update you since we've been getting a lot of questions.
Over the last year, we've been feeling like God was leading us to make a change to the path we were on. We couldn't quite put our finger on it, but we just didn't feel totally settled. We were receiving very little communication from our agency and we didn't feel right about it. Nothing unethical was happening, but we decided that because there was a child and a biological family's life and well-being on the line, that was too big of a deal to continue with an agency that we didn't feel 100% comfortable with. Again, NOTHING unethical or immoral has happened with that agency and we still have a ton of respect for them. It was just a personal decision for our family.
This spring, we began looking into some other options. We found an agency we adored and had a ton of faith in and began talking with them. They let us know that the two countries we qualified for were Bulgaria and China. This was an obvious choice for us because of our family's deep connections with the beautiful country of China. For the first time in over a year, I was genuinely excited about our adoption process. I truly believed this was the ending God had in mind for us and I was overjoyed to finally be heading there.
One Thursday in June, we cut ties with our old agency and applied for our new agency's China program. We were ecstatic. I could already picture Aunt LaLa (Lillie) teaching our little one about his/her culture and heritage. I was already planning Chinese New Year celebrations in my mind (I'm always looking for an excuse to plan another party!). I was already dreaming about Pax and Chinababy (the artist formerly known as Caribaby) playing in the backyard, splashing in the bath tub, and staying up way too late at night chatting about life.
The following day we got a call from the agency. They had received our application and were so excited for us to begin our process, but they had some bad news. She said they found out the day before, the exact day we submitted our application, that China had changed the law and were now requiring families' youngest child to be at least 3 years old before they could start the adoption process. We were devastated. We legitimately thought we had found the final road in our journey, but unfortunately that is not the case.
At this point, we're back to square one. We're looking at every option -- a domestic adoption, foster care, a different country, trying for another biological child. We believe whole-heartedly that God has laid adoption on our hearts for a reason, and our hearts' desire is for adoption to be a part of our family's story. We have no clue what that will look like at this point, but we trust that it will come to fruition eventually in the perfect way and at the perfect time.
We've gotten a lot of questions lately so in case you're wondering the same things, here are some answers...
-- So, what now?
We wait. We feel that God is leading us into a very intentional season of waiting and to be honest, it's refreshing. For the last four years, we've been in some form of an adoption process and it's exhausting. We're taking a break to rest and recharge and pray about what the next step is.
-- What about all the money you've saved and people have donated toward your adoption?
We still have it! It's resting safely in a savings account and it is never touched except for adoption expenses. NO, we do not use it to go shopping or on vacations or any other crazy thing like that. Ever. If you think this is happening, you are more than welcome to come discuss your concerns with us face-to-face and I can tell you all about my obsessive budgeting and credit card reward tricks that we use for those things. Remember, our family is an open book. Let's choose conversations over assumptions.
-- Speaking of money, did you get any of the funds back you had to pay to the first agency?
Unfortunately, no. Thankfully we had only paid a few thousand instead of the entire amount. We are continuing to save money and are trusting to have the perfect amount exactly when we need it...whenever that might be!
-- What does Pax want?
To stay an only child forever. His vote doesn't count.
Things may be a bit quiet from us for awhile (says the girl who hasn't blogged in a year) as we pray and process. We cannot begin to express our thankfulness for your support over the last four years. It's been a roller coaster for sure, but we could not have survived it without such an amazing community of encouragers like yourselves. We are forever grateful.
We are unsure what the future holds for our family, but we are trusting the one who placed this desire in our hearts in the first place. Thank you for your prayers!
With Love,
Isaac
Maggie
Pax
Caribaby/Chinababy/JoplinBaby/Bellybaby2.0/Who even knows
